I can’t picture anyone daydreaming about me. I can’t picture someone thinking about me when they’re laying in bed before they fall asleep. I can’t picture anyone telling their friends about me. I can’t picture anyone getting butterflies because I hugged them, or even just because I made eye contact with them. I can’t picture someone smiling because my name lit up their phone. I just can’t.
(Source: c0ntrasts, via rlystoned-deactivated20130119)
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i don’t like being told that i’ve changed, because i can’t do anything about it. i change because of situations around me. if i don’t fit in, i change my personality. usually, that doesn’t change anything because they’ll still not notice me. it has come to the point where it frustrates me, so much. i’ve come to the conclusion that i don’t, and will never, fit in with the rest of the people. i’ve always been told that there will be people that are smarter, better looking, or nicer but recently i’ve realized that it’s not just some people… everybody is. when people ask me what i would change about myself, i just want to say ‘everything about me’…
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do you ever hate someone so much that it physically pains you
(via littlebarista)
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so there’s this guy that used to like me in 8th grade, but i was really shy back then. when he told me he liked me, i just sort of freaked out and he thought it was a bad freak out so we didnt talk for about 4 months. i was still way to shy, i never told him that it was a good freak out, because honestly i liked him as well. oh well, so time passed and now we’re in 12th grade. last year, he got a girlfriend but i have a feeling they broke up now. anyways, today in class we were talking about dilemmas and decisions we had to make in our lifes. he put up his hand, and i was very very interested in what he was going to say. he started talking about a dilemma he saw last night on tv, but ‘it never really happened to him’. it was about how this guy used to really like a girl, but because she didnt like him back, he tried to move on. eventually he got a girlfriend, but then he found out that the girl he used to really like liked him back. obviously he still had feelings for her, so he had to decide if he wanted to stay with his girlfriend, or if he was gonna go back to the first girl. right after he said this, we made eyecontact. i honestly didnt know what to do with my face, or what i was going to say. why? because i like him…
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